When children believe that there's not enough of what they need. They may feel they have to compete for parents' attention, affection, recognition, or time.
What perents should do:-
- Don’t play favorites.
- Avoid comparing one child to another.
- Listen to the children's complaints to get clues to what the "rivals" believe is in short supply: "Dad always hugs Kendra first!"
- Let children know you understand their feelings even though you don't agree with them: "Yes, your brother needs more help getting dressed than you do, but you are just as important to me as he is."
- Spend some time alone with each child doing something he or she really enjoys: taking a walk, reading stories, playing catch-10 minutes a day for a week can do wonders.
- If one child says unkind things to you about another, remind him that "she's still one of us". That response reassures the child that he would still belong to the family even if a sibling had ill feelings toward him .
- Do not worry about treating all your children exactly alike. Children need comfort, help, and encouragement at different times and in different ways. When a child questions the attention you give to her sibling, reassure her that when she needs help, you will provide it.
- Get over being angry. Communicate with your sibling how their actions are hurting you. Stay calm and clear in your communication.
- Compliment one child anytime he or she shows kindness, consideration or empathy to a sibling. Give immediate but appropriate praise.
- Help your child to see the advantages that come with age and development (e.g. more time with perents for younger sibling and more priviledge and freedom for older children).
- Avoid trying to decide who start the fight. Usually all children involve have responsibility. Giving consequences for all children can avoid fights in future.
- Set your kids up to cooperate rather than compete. For example, have them race the clock to pick up toys, instead of racing each other.
- Plan family activities that are fun for everyone. If your kids have good experiences together, it acts as a buffer when they come into conflict. It’s easier to work it out with someone you share warm memories with.
Source Website: http://illinoisearlylearning.org/; http://www.med.umich.edu/; http://www.ehow.com/; http://www.brightfutures.org/
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