EQ Parents Talk by Professor Lee - Part 2

Example Case 1: Always give clear, direct instruction.
When your kids trying to run across the road. Our immediate reaction always shout " Don't run across the road". WRONG. Professor Lee said this is like the Lemon theory. When you keep repeating the lemon than they will think about lemon even though you specifically ask him not to. e.g "Don't think about lemon, don't ever think about lemon, don't think about the juicy lemon......" What are you thinking now "Lemon" right?

Correct instruction is "STOP. COME BACK"

Example Case 2: Question with Doubt
Normally when we go back we will ask question like " Have you finished your homework?" or Have you taken your bath". Try not to ask this kind of questions as your kids might not happy that he feel you always doubt on his ability and he reluctant to answer your question.

Correct asking is " I am sure you have finished your homework already right?" This way he happily answer your question " Yes, I finished already" or he will feel guilty if he have finished and tell you which one he haven't finished.

Example case 3: Bad Comments
A lots of parents never say good comments about their kids in front of friends or relative. They will always said " Aiya him ah very naughty, never listen to me......" or "He so stupid, homework never finish, exam so bad...." This way your son will think since you say I am naughty, stupid, ..... than let it be. He just accepted what you said and doesn't need to work hard for it.